Hey lovelies, I know I’m a bit late to start talking about the fact that it’s mental health awareness week but in my defence I’ve been bed ridden for most of this week with no energy to do anything. However I didn’t want to let this week pass without saying something so today’s post is all about mental health with the main focus being body image.
I know this isn’t a new topic for me but that doesn’t mean it’s any less important to talk about. We have to keep discussions going if we’re ever going to make any real changes. So here we go, mental health awareness week 2019.
Body image is something I think everyone will have struggled with at one point. We always find something about ourselves that we don’t like and decide that if we could just change that one thing (or multiple things, I’m not going to pretend that it’s only ever one thing someone doesn’t like about their body) then we’d be so much happier.
Maybe we would. Maybe if we changed our weight we’d feel better about ourselves, or if we did something with our hair, or got some dental work done you might even consider some plastic surgery. And that’s all ok. It’s ok to want to change your appearance. But I think what you have to think about before you set yourself the task of changing yourself physically, is that you have to examine your mental state. Really think about if you’ll actually be happy after you finally make those changes or how will you feel if you don’t manage to make those changes? Half the people I know that have went on diets or fitness regimes find themselves constantly moving their goal further and further away. They’re never satisfied with how much they’ve achieved because they still think they have more to do.
When they get like that I try to encourage them to learn to love themselves for how they are. Well in truth before they even start their diet/regime/whatever I’m preaching self love and body positivity. Not because it’s easier but because if you learn to love your body as it is then you may find you no longer want to change it, or you might find it easier to make more gradual changes that are easier to maintain and more satisfying in the long term. I’m not saying you should never go on a diet or start a fitness regime. I’m just trying to say that if your head isn’t in the right place then you’ll likely find it very difficult to get your body to the “right” place.
We all have our bad days. I’m no exception to that. We have days where we feel on top of the world and ready to do anything but we also have days where we can’t stand the idea of facing the world. That’s ok. Life can be hard and having a day where you can’t muster the energy to be a beacon of self love and positivity is totally fine. You’ve got to take things one step at a time and not worry if you stumble back a little. As long as you keep trying to move forward you’ll get there.
And if you need help there are so many resources available now.
*Please note most of these are UK/Scottish based, this is not an exhaustive list there are so many resources out there*
I’ve been asked a couple of times how I got the confidence to do modelling – especially lingerie & nude modelling – and I always say the same thing: I started with selfies. The selfie craze and Snapchat getting so popular encouraged me to take more photos of myself. It got me to the point where I could take a selfie and not hate it. I cute take a selfie and think it was cute, that it was cute enough to share with people and my friends were very supportive and always said nice things. I mean they were nice enough to put up with me spamming them with bad selfies that had every filter available over them haha but they were always supportive and I really appreciate that. From there I began experimenting with my wardrobe. Trying things I’d thought I would never wear – crop tops, shorts, long skirts – things which now I fully embrace and wear whenever I feel like it (weather be damned haha). It took time but I built up the confidence to be bolder and learnt that I could wear whatever I wanted. From there I decided the next logical step was to try and get other people to take my picture. Not just in a casual sense but in a “can I stand in front of a photographer and like the pictures I get back” kind of way. From my first shoot I was hooked. Looking back my poses are awful, my makeup and hair were lacking and in all honesty the photographer picked some very unflattering angles but it didn’t matter because I had managed to do it. From there I created a modelling portfolio profile and started trying to get modelling work. Now 3 years later here I am.
Still having wobbles and moments where I wish I was a size 10 but I’m happy to keep taking things step by step. I know that I can be my own size and shape and that it won’t stop me from achieving my dreams so I’ll just keep doing my best and I’ll get there eventually. I know it won’t be me that needs to change, it will be society and beauty standards that have to change. We can make them change if we all learn to stop hating ourselves and realise we’re being sold toxic ideas that have no place in the modern world.
I realise I’ve waffled on a little bit xD so I’ll stop here. But if you need help then remember help is out there and there’s no shame in seeking it out. You got this.
And as always, stay safe and be happy x